• shemahassan1

Letting go of the past.

Updated: Feb 11, 2021

How many of us have allowed our past to hold us prisoners. We become so consumed with our past mistakes, hurt and resentment, that we let moments and opportunities pass us by. The past has passed; there is nothing that we can do to bring it back. Take a pause and see what parts of your past you are unable to move away from and ask yourself “why is this”. What happened that you are unable to let go and make peace with. Is it a betrayal, heartbreak, a mistake that you made? Everything that happens to us the good and the bad, you can learn something from that will help strengthen you. Have you had allowed yourself the time to feel all the emotions that come with thinking about the past, ask yourself why these emotions are coming up for you? A lot of people suppress all of their emotions because it is too painful to experience, however if you do not experience it, you can not release it. You have got to let yourself feel the hurt, the pain and resentment and then be able to let it go. The key step to letting go of the past, is acknowledging what has happened, how it made you feel, feeling it and then releasing it. You have got to take lessons from the past, learn from the failures, mend your broken heart, get up from the fall and see how your past can be used to help you grow.

Do not let yesterday’s regret rob you of today’s happiness. The fact of the matter is that we can not change the past; it is gone and will never come back. You need to learn to forgive. Forgive those that have wronged you. Forgive those that let you down. and most importantly forgive yourself. Forgiving others does not mean that they are worthy of your forgiveness, it means that you deserve peace and happiness. Without forgiveness you are carrying around a lot of pain and this destroys you slowly. Stop carrying around all the anger, resentment, hate and sadness because it is a heavy burden to carry. Let go of the anger, hate and resentment, once you let go and forgive, the real healing begins. You have to make peace with the past and heal from your past trauma. Then you can let it go and focus on being your best today. Do not give those that wronged you the power to be able to control you and your emotions; they are not worth thinking about. You have to also come to terms with the fact that you may never get the apology you deserve and waiting for an apology can put a pause on the healing process. Forgiveness is accepting an apology you did not receive. You have to understand that the forgiveness is not for them but for you because you are worthy and deserving of peace and happiness.

As part of the healing process, it is imperative that you engage in self care. Take care of yourself emotionally, physically and psychologically. Make sure that you are kind to yourself; forgive yourself for your past mistakes. Take all the lessons (the good, the bad and the ugly) use it to strengthen you and help you grow. Use all of your energy into improving and healing yourself.

You have to understand why it is crucial and necessary to move on from your past. Is holding onto your past serving you in a positive way or negative way? What has holding onto the past taken away from you? Think of all the reasons letting go of the past will do for you and how much better you will feel. It is so crucial to move forward, for your own well being, to be more present and to feel free and not be trapped in the past. You have to make a conscious effort to let go of the past, be aware of your thoughts and try to change it. I know it is easier said than done, at times you may want to move forward and leave the past behind but it somehow it rears its ugly head in. Try to understand what your triggers are? You need to be aware of this thought process and what leads you down this path and ways to steer clear from it. Is there someone or a situation in your life currently that is making you feel stuck in the past and somehow brings the past to the forefront. You have got to create a distance between you and the person or situation for your own healing. If this is someone that you care about and they are unaware of how their actions are having an effect on you, be sure to have a conversation with them and create boundaries with them. Let them know that you are trying to move forward and you no longer want to speak about the past. Think about all the possibilities that the future holds, this will enable you to let go of the past.

Make sure that you surround yourself with positive people that are there to uplift and support you. It is so crucial to have a support system on your side to help deal with everything that is coming up for you, they can provide the clarity and guidance you need. If you do not have anyone to speak to, you can go and speak with a professional. Speaking to a professional is beneficial; they will give you the resources and tools needed to move forward in a healthy way.

Do not let your past heartbreak rob you of your future love. Do not let your past failure rob you of your future success. Do not let your past breakdown rob you of your future break through. Do not let your past sadness rob you of your future happiness. Do not live in your past, learn from it, heal from it and move on! You have a beautiful today to live and bright tomorrow to look forward to.

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