• shemahassan1

How to stop caring about what people think.

Updated: Feb 11, 2021

We would all be lying if we said we did not care about what others thought of us. In life we get consumed with how people think of us, we give them the power to dictate what we do and how we live our lives. You have the power to change that today, you can choose to take your power back and stop giving power to those that don't add any value to your life. Do whatever brings joy into your life as long as you are not hurting anyone. You just have to be true to who you are and you can only do that once you start living on your own terms. You will come to realize that caring about what others think of you makes you become a prisoner and that every decision you make is always tailored and geared to get the validation and approval of others. And that is no way to live, it robs you of peace, it makes you lose confident and you will never be satisfied because no matter what you do, you will always have critics.

When we are constantly worried about what others think of us, we become slaves to them. Every choice is made with them in mind. You are not being authentic to yourself because you are too busy molding yourself into what others expect you to be and living this way will severely affect your confidence. The truth of the matter is when we allow others opinion to matter so much they dictate how you feel about yourself. You are perfect the way you are, stand in your truth and be you. Those that love you will accept you for who you are and they would not want you to be anyone but yourself. Those that try to mold you into who they think you should be, don’t deserve to have you. Build your self esteem up to the point that a lack of validation and approval will not affect you and your self confidence. Always keep in mind that if you are constantly chasing likes, approval and validation you will be left empty, it is not a realistic thing that will sustain you. Being confident and having a high self esteem is something that is a lifelong journey that you have to embark on. It is something that you work on daily. Every day challenge your negative thoughts, let go of the self limiting beliefs you have about yourself. Every day do daily self love affirmations. Be kind and gentle with yourself; speak to yourself in a kind and nurturing manner. Forgive yourself for your past mistakes and don’t be too hard on yourself for falling along the way. I have listed all of these things you can do to improve your self esteem because I belief once you are confident, you won’t have the need to care about the opinions of others and you will not allow it to affect you in a negative way.

It is also crucial to know who you are and what your values are and what you stand for. If you have strong values, you will not feel lost, you have a strong foundation of values to stand for and you are less likely to allow others opinions to affect you in a negative way. You will know what matters to you the most and you will do your best to live up to your values. However when you don’t have strong core values, you might look to others and adapt to what you think they want you to be. Form your own values, always know that you are constantly doing your best and it is okay to make mistakes along the way.

You have to understand that when you care so much about the opinions of others, you have given them control over your life. However I don't want you to feel too bad because at one point or another we have all got consumed with what people think of us, we gave them the power to dictate what we do and how we live our lives. Today that comes to an end, it all starts with you making the choice to live for yourself. You have the power to stop giving power to those that do not add value to your life. Do whatever makes your heart smile as long as you are not hurting anyone. You just have to be true to who you are and you can only start doing that if you are authentic to yourself.

I came to a point in my life where I live my life on my own terms and those that love me are always supportive of the choices that I make. Living my life in my own terms has made me more confident and content with the choices that I make in my life because “I” made those choices and they were not influenced or geared towards getting the validation and approval of others. You need to take a step back and silence all the outside noise and really figure out what it is that makes you truly happy without being influenced by what you think others would say about your choices. You have to realize that this is your life to live, you can not please the whole world, there is always someone that is going to have a negative opinion of you and you know what, that is their problem and not yours. When you base your feelings and self worth on the approval and opinions of others, you become a slave to them; they control your happiness and lack thereof. You need take control of your feelings; do not give others the power to dictate your emotions. Do not base your emotions on what others think of you. The way to change how you react to others opinions is to change your thoughts, ask yourself why is this making you feel this way, challenge it and let it go. We can not control how others act towards us but we are in control of how we react to it, always remember that.

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